My old all-black 1999 Miata: hand-placed color-shift hearts, WAIFU plates, race number 13, RGB underglow, and a curse that ended relationships. Video inside.

Forget the "hairdresser" stereotypes—this 1990s roadster has been resurrected for the apocalypse. Between the massive 32-inch mud terrains, the rugged external exoskeleton, and a custom flatbed that proudly bears the name "Booger Cookie," this NB Miata from Hell is built for pure chaos. It’s a Mad Max-inspired masterpiece that proves one thing: I bet this guy parties.

Mamma Mia! There’s nothing like the scream of a turbocharged Italian engine weaving through a sea of orange cones. I took my "spicy Italian Miata"—the Abarth 124 Spider—to the SW SCCA event at The Commons to show off her racing stripes and pure Veleno. We finished 13th overall, beat out the other Alfa, and left with a few battle scars to prove it. Forza Abarth!